7.14.2011

Isaiah's Butterfly Footprints

I have to thank Butterfly Footprints for Isaiah's beautiful photo.  I sent in a couple months ago a photo of his tiny footprints and she turned them into a butterfly.  I think it turned out beautifully and my little "Isaiah art collage" is turning out amazing!

I miss him so much sometimes my heart literally aches!! I have faith and I know that one day we will be together again, but I can't stop thinking that he should be here with me, he'd be just over a month old!  God gives us challenges in our lives and it is up to us to learn and grow from those challenges.  It is up to us to decide how we are going to react to the challenge and what we can and will do to overcome it.  I don't think I will ever overcome this...I am just learning to live without my children!  I loved my first baby from the moment I knew I was carrying such a precious gift, and it pains me to say this, but I had so much more of a bond with Isaiah.  I knew him longer, I felt his movements, I heard his heart beating.  I feel guilty for having a closer bond with one more than the other, but I can't help how I feel!  Maybe I would feel differently if I had known the gender and could have named that baby.  I may never know if that would have helped.  I love both my babies and I hope they feel the same way about their mommy! 


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